This may come as a surprise to many, but leaving a job is never easy. There are always reasons to stay. You make friendships. You start to learn tricks on how to perform your job better and quicker. You enjoy the spinach omelet and bacon on Tuesday mornings in the corporate cafeteria. You have invested your heart and soul into the job, but the sad truth is it doesn’t love you back. At what point does contemplation get replaced with conviction? It’s time to FINALLY leave. If we can manage – and refute – the rationale on WHY we think we should stay, it makes the conclusion of needing to leave easier. Jettison fleeting thoughts; think deeply about the questions you continually ponder. This blog post will contain 5 key tips for YOU to finally call it quits – and move on to bigger and better things.
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The thought of leaving can be harrowing and untimely. It’s easier to do nothing about it. But you have to face the reality, and that can be sobering. We mentioned a few reasons why “we” stay, but what are some other challenges in leaving? Here are some of the most difficult questions that hold us back. Can you think of any others?
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“I cannot leave this job where am I going to find another opportunity like this”? Sound familiar? Maybe you are working from home and it’s a convenient work schedule. Complacency has its benefits, but is this opportunity providing growth? Maybe this job is in the most perfectly suited industry, which took 9 months to get in. But having the direct experience now will make it more likely that you can find ANOTHER job in this industry. Overall, I find that many are discouraged in their current situation and the “opportunity” aforementioned is not as steadfast as it seems, if you break it down.
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“I won’t find another job that will pay this well”. This is another common response to the question, WHY don’t you leave? Money is important. Happiness is more important. Or, why not have both?
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“I don’t have time to look”. Okay, so you stay at a job or role that you don’t like because you don’t have time to find something new? I think this is a prime example of WHY you should be looking, if you are working all the time. What about the weekends? What about 2-3 hours a week – later in the evening perhaps after the kids are in bed? You always have time for “Game of Thrones”.
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“I am going to see if things get better”. Mind you, this was the answer you told yourself 2 years ago when you first contemplated if it’s time to make a move. Will you wait another 2 years to see if things are going any better? Kick the can strategy. It never works, eventually you become the can. Or the can‘t.
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5 TIPS to help you finally leave
Once you undergo introspection, and can understand the questions above (deeply ponder), you have one foot outside the door.
- 1. Be analytical with those “internal” questions above by refuting your rationalization. Take any of them. “I don’t have time to look”. Instead of letting the thought have its way with you replace with rationale as to WHY this needs to be the case. I can say to myself, I don’t have time to look, because I work too many hours. OR, I don’t have time to look, UNLESS it is on the weekend or a couple nights per week. MAKE A PLAN. Stay true to that plan. You don’t need 17 hours and 12 minutes each week to look. You have to budget your time. If it’s 2 hours during the week and maybe 1.5 hours on the weekend – that will work just fine.
- 2. Where will you find an Opportunity like “this”? Here is a way to combat this one. You found the opportunity you are CURRENTLY at, right? So, why can’t it happen again? Also, think about what is NOT fulfilling in this job. Is it the commute? The leadership vision? Lack of growth opportunities? Poor benefits? Focus on the bad, because this will serve as motivation. You aren’t leaving due to the convenient and admirable qualities of the job. EVERY job has good and bad, but some are more imbalanced than others. Make a Pros and cons list. WHAT truly matters to you?
- 3. “I won’t find another job that will pay this well”. This couldn’t be further from the truth. In fact, the very reason most employees leave their current position is to get a pay increase. An interested company couldn’t / SHOULDN’T make an offer (you will accept), if they offer you LESS than what you are making now. The rule of thumb is usually 10%. If you don’t get a 10% increase keep looking until you do. You will always make more money leaving (just don’t equate this to happiness).
- 4. “I am going to see if things get better”. To me, this is just a lack of motivation and drive. Once you realize things really won’t get any better, you need to be decisive and commit to making a change. There is no magic wand on this one. You have to learn to be firm on your intuition. I suggest making a plan in your calendar. What date will you start applying to jobs? What is your goal date in GETTING a new job? Simple as that. Stick to the plan.
- 5. You know those moments (they should be happening often if you are at the brink) when you WANT to go home and clean-up your resume or search job sites to see what’s out there right now? DON’T suppress this. The tip is this – FOLLOW your urges, especially if they are happening frequently. Look, we all have bad days at work. Or, there are people we may not like in the workplace… But when negative or fortuitous occurrences happen regularly this is a tell-tale sign it’s time to do something about it. Don’t think too much – just ACT on it.
The psychology of jobs is much like that of relationships. It can be easy to overthink or over-rationalize, but the fondness of the heart always wins in the end. Be faithful, to your dreams and career.
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